I just can't lie anymore! / look at my face and my hands / I feel so distracted So full of / anxiety. The damn cigarette proves / it. I swore I'd quit.
I want to confess something. / Maybe you'll get it and actually care. / I've been dreaming / Always the same thing.
I see this girl. She's nude. Perfect body. Very / beautiful breasts. She seems incredibly free / Always aroused. Softly brushing her erect nipples against / A boy. She kisses him. Delicately first. Then / Passionately! Their mouths open. My god! / they're starving for each other! Their fingers lace / & their bodies mold into one. I can hardly stand. My / knees get so weak.
I think about her constantly. She is me / for godsakes! It's like she's been hiding / or trapped the whole time I lived in there. I / don't know. Maybe paralyzed.
You see what I'm longing for! / Finding her was a godsend. A / miracle.
I despise all my lying. I envy / her. I long to be free, like she / is. Free to find him. And be me.
I refuse to agonize anymore. / So I'm leaving. Can you understand / why I have to do this?